Easter Spending Without A Plan

Posted on March 24, 2008

I have a small confession that I need to make. We spent almost $50 this month on Easter supplies and candy. That was just for our 2 year old, since the 2 month old isn’t old enough to partake. Some of you may laugh, saying “I spent way more”, but to me that is a large sum on items that have almost no lasting purpose.

What happened? Two things, lack of planning and lack of communication. This is the first year that The Rockette and I were forced to mesh our individual preferences into our own special tradition. This normally takes some intentionality or you end up avoided the issue or fighting. We didn’t fight, so we default to each of trying to accomplish our own separate goals. Even more The Happy Pebble was inundated with stuff to the point that I think he only saw a bunch of stuff rather than a few select special items.

If we had talked about Easter spending before hand we would have had a plan for our money. As it is, the spending will come out of the money we have been putting away for adoption lawyer fees. The key here is intentionality. Even though this is a tiny sum of money, if we aren’t being intention about these decision then we set the stage for problems on larger purchases like homes and cars.

So what do we do about it. First, since we can’t return the perishable items we need to let it go. Stewing and/or blaming really won’t help. Second, we will make sure that the we have a spending plan in place before the next Easter comes. With a plan in place, I will be able to avoid the $25 spent in the local Chocolate House and come out with the one Dark Chocolate Coconut Cream Egg with my son’s name on it as I had intended.

The key is to have a plan for your money. This intentionality may look different to each person, but it will really change your finances!

» Filed Under About Me, Planning, Psychology of Spending, Spending

MBA Complete - Was It Worth It?

Posted on March 18, 2008

This past Sunday I handed in my final paper for my MBA degree with a Marketing concentration at Drexel University’s Lebow College of Business. The finality is so fresh that end of my long two and half year journey hasn’t sunk in. It is starting though…Tuesday is my normal class night and I got to stay home with my family!

The first question most people will ask is “was getting an MBA worth”? On a personal level, it was a truly great experience. One that has given my a lot of confidence, motivation, purpose, and energy. On a business and pure learning level, I am not so sure. I think something like the Personal MBA or selected great texts from Amazon and a mentor would have been more useful and practical.

The degree cost about $55,000 in tuition and books, but that was 100% covered by my employer. I even made money, since I sold most of my books on Amazon after the class was over. The degree did cost me time, commitment, and the sacrifice of my family.

As for salary, it will be a while before I know, since I don’t get a single penny more from my current employer for finishing an MBA. One article suggests that

According to one salary guide, an MBA is worth about $10-30,000 a year over a bachelor’s degree, but the salary increase you could see may be much less — or much more. Factors that can affect your salary include:

whether you stay with your current employer or seek a job with a new employer.

the amount of relevant experience you have for the job you are seeking.

the reputation of the graduate school you attended.

the type of job you are seeking — and the level of supply/demand for workers.

the industries where you are seeking a job.

the location of the jobs you are seeking.

A fellow blogger with an MBA, FMF @ Free Money Finance, reported that he almost doubled his salary in 5 years during the 90’s. I have no doubt that I might see similar returns.

All in all, I am glad to be done, but it was a great experience. As I collect my thoughts over the next week or two I will provide so more insight on my MBA experience.

Quote Source: Quint Careers
Note: Picture is not me, but a graduation at Harvard the most prestigious business school in the US.

» Filed Under About Me, Chasing Dreams, Salary

How The Happy Rock Went Bold

Posted on March 1, 2008

I talked about how success requires bold decisions, so I figured I should share the decisions that where bold and went against the grain to get me were I am at today. Where am I today, you ask? Well…awesome growing marriage, beautiful wife, two wonderful children, paid off 70,000 in debt, no debt except for a mortgage, 32% equity in a home, $12,000 emergency fund, and a net worth of about $150,000 at age 29 to list a few. I am ecstatic about my as it stands, I truly am, not one complaint.

The question remains, what decisions stand out as catalysts towards achieving my dreams:

Getting Married. I have little doubt that the majority of the positive things I have accomplished in life are directly related to my wonderful wife , our accountability, her inspiration, and our friendship.

Adopting Two Wonderful Adoptions. It is amazing how much children have furthered my desire to change and grow. They haven’t been the hinderance that DINKS and single people told me they would be, in fact they have been a catalyst to positive growth.

Jesus. Some may disagree, that’s fine, but I know first hand the difference that a personal relationship with Jesus Christ has made in my life. This one is a little unique since I feel that the decision found me during my teen years rather then being something I chose to further my life.

Giving Up Debt. Wiped away $70,000 in debt, and we haven’t looked back.

Paying $10,000 Cash For Our Wedding.

Choosing A Small House Very Affordable House. This took some major discipline and teamwork to stick to this wise plan, but our lives and finances have benefited immensely. The choice for a 5 minute commute helps too! Check out my post on delayed financial gratification to see an example of how much difference it can make.

Embarking on an MBA(Master’s in Business Administration). A wonderful 2 and a half year personal journey that has set the stage for the next phase of my career and financial dreams. I have just two classes lef until I am finished!

Driving a Beater Car. My car says a lot about me, and has barely cost me a dime in 5 years.

The key is the intentionality. We must be vigilant about figuring out our goals and dreams and making decisions that align and SPEED you towards those goals. Commit to the dreams.

» Filed Under About Me, Chasing Dreams, Favorites, Materialism

Go Big or Go Home – Why Success Requires Bold Decisions

Posted on February 29, 2008

“Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results”

- Albert Einstein

The truth in that little statement is profound. If we truly want to succeed in our financial life and with our life goals in general, we must be willing to fully commit to our dreams. Often we don’t do much more than give lip service to the big things in life. Now, if you are happy have average or slightly better than average results, than go right on doing same things as everyone else. If you keep using those credit cards, leasing cars, buying cars and houses that our over our price range, spending frivulously, and not saving we can expect to end up like everyone else. If you don’t want to end up like everyone else then we need to stop acting like everyone else.

Sell the truck that you have a $20,000 loan on.
Move to a place that will help you accomplish your dreams.
Cut up the credit cards and stop using debt.
Take a second job for a little while to get out of debt faster.
Stop worrying about what people think or how much they have.
Hang out with friends that will challenge you, not bring you down.
Drive a reliable beater.

The list could go on and on and on. Personally, I don’t really care what the exact decision is…but that you are paying attention and making intentional bold decisions to advance you towards your dreams.

What bold decisions have been running from?

Post your recent bold decisions in the comments sections as public declaration and an added level of accountability.

Here are my bold decisions.

» Filed Under About Me, Friends, Living with Purpose, Motivation

How Much Does Adoption Cost? – Less Than You Might Think

Posted on January 23, 2008

The average infant adoption in the US can vary from $5,000 to $30,000 and on average costs $15,000 - $20,000. Our two newborn infant adoptions cost us about $11,000(0 after credits) and an estimated $15,000($2,000 after credits). This article will not break down the different costs associated with adoptions, but it will list multiple ways that adoption expenses can be considerably lower than those numbers suggest. I am speaking from experience since the expenses of our first adoption were more than covered by the programs/tips below.

First and foremost, the Federal Adoption Tax Credit that was signed into law by George Bush in 2002. The adoption tax credit offers an $11,390 tax credit in 2007 for qualified expenses on all domestic and foreign adoptions. For us, we were able to use all but $200 of tax credit in one year with some special planning. The credit alone covered almost all of our adoption expenses. The big downside is that the credit often comes a full year after you incur the expenses. About.com does a nice job explaining the adoption tax credit.
Adoption Subsidies. Any child adopted out of the United States foster care system with special needs will receive Medicaid and a monthly subsidy based on the severity of the disability. The average subsidy is about $350 a month. With this government bill the US government is able to save billions and provide better care for our children at the same time. Adopting.org provides a nice overview of subsidies.
Employee Adoption Assistance. You mileage will vary from company to company, but many companies have programs that will provide a cash assistance payment for adoption. The programs seem to be rarely mentioned and remain buried in a manual sitting in an HR office somewhere. Rules and benefits will vary, but my company provides employees with up to $2,000 per adoption. One painless form and a copy photocopies and we were awarded the full $2,000.
Medical Costs Related to Pregnancy. Again, the amount mother’s will have pay from conception to birth will vary greatly depending on your health coverage and area, but they can often cost people thousands of dollars. There is no need to worry about things like co-pays and partial covered hospital visits procedures when adopting.
Physical Costs of Pregnancy. These would include lost productivity for the mother, lost time at work, and any medical complications that may arise.
It’s just plain worth it. This isn’t a savings per se, but more of a perspective shift that makes any money you have to spend pale in comparison to the experience. If you are fully committed to providing a loving household for a child who may not otherwise be given that opportunity, than the monetary side of things tends have less sting. Also along these lines, many people often support your actions and are willing to help out in ways that you don’t even expect.

That list might be longer than you thought it would be, given the huge numbers that are often thrown around for the cost of adoption. I hope it helps provide a clearer picture of the true costs of adoption. Let me know if I missed any, or your thoughts.
Source : Adoption Guide

» Filed Under About Me, Children and Money, Money Savers

Let’s Welcome The Happy Pebble Jr.

Posted on January 21, 2008

The Happy Rock Garden welcomed its fourth member on Friday night, a second adopted son Julian. I will dub him The Happy Pebble Jr. to go along with our first Happy Pebble.

He was born on Wednesday the 16th and we brought him home on Friday night. It all happened quite fast and unexpectedly which just adds to the joy and excitement! Family and children are more amazing than I could have ever dreamed. Cheers!

On a separate and unrelated side note, I will be taking requests for guest posters. I will be sleeping way too much that I won’t have the time to produce the same level of quality content, especially with my MBA finishing in just over 8 weeks. Email me with a general topic and an estimated time of arrival, and I will choose a handful of authors to submit articles. Thanks.

*Note : That is not a picture of our children.

» Filed Under About Me, Misc.

Christmas, Debt, and Spending – Our Example

Posted on December 19, 2007

In the last post I asked some questions about the nature of Christmas spending and what we could do to change. I wanted to share some of the changes that my family has undergone in the last for years to fight the consumerism onslaught and then a few lessons learned.

The Happy Rockette’s Family

To set the stage, my wife is one a five sisters. Four of them are married, and we have 8 nieces and nephews(ages 1-6) between us. We do Christmas morning with at the Rockette’s parent’s house, and everyone was buying gifts for each other and the children. I remember walking into the gift room and not even being able to sit down, because of the huge collection of gifts. I think we spent well over a thousand dollars that year in gifts.

Things had to change. We started some conversations about doing a name exchange between the adults, and a year later we did it. There was a $50-75 range for each person, each person could get quality over quantity. The following year, the children still went home with a truckload of toys. This year, we also did a name exchange between the children with a $20 cap. We will see how it works out, but it is another step in the right direction.

The Happy Rock’s Family

For my side of the family, we also went through a similar progression. A few years back we moved from buying smaller gifts for everyone to a $50 name exchange. My Grandmother still buys for everyone, but I think that is just the way grandparent’s are! This year we are not actually giving gifts to one another, but we will pool our money together to buy an animal for a deserving family in need. Click here for the Hiefer Project catalog, if you want to learn more about what they do. I think it is a solid organization with a great philosophy.

In all, we have more than halved our Christmas expenses(and stress), and we feel more fulfilled.

Tips For Changing Christmas Spending.

Here are a couple of key observations that I gained while we changed our family traditions:

Changes, especially changes to deep rooted traditions take time. Focus on the direction of the ship more than the destination. Life is a journey.
Real people are involved. Sometimes relationships are messy. People can get frustrated, upset, and offended. We need to approach each other in love, courage, honesty, and patience. You may need to spill the beans about your debt struggles, or walk your family through the exact reasons you can’t do gifts. You may even need to reassure them that this doesn’t change how you feel about them. Those type of conversations will probably deepen the relationship more than gifts ever would.
People who naturally show love through gifts will be more affected than those like me who are on the cheap miser end of the spectrum and show love in other ways. This underscores again the need for patience and love.
Shifting your focus onto those that are more needy through donations of money or services can really help change perspectives. Activities like doing Angel Tree gifts as a family really bring people together.

That is how Christmas has been changing around here, what about you?

» Filed Under About Me, Giving, Holiday Wishes, Materialism

Quitting Cable - The Deed Is Done

Posted on December 11, 2007

After some months of deliberation, I finally canceled cable. For those that don’t know the background, I put out a request for some support while I was considering dropping the tube in July. Then I posted some reasons why I should cancel cable backed by studies, and then finally provided a small blogosphere roundup on the issue.

The support was tremendous, and in August I got the nerve to cancel cable and buy an AppleTV. I still wanted to catch a handful of my favorite shows. To my dismay, my TV does not have component video jacks to support AppleTV! I searched for a solution and found a converter that would allow AppleTV to work with RCA jacks, but that added another $150 to the solution. Needless to say, the solution died.

In late November, the issue finally surfaced again and I was ready to cancel the cable again. This time I was ready to pull plug and even forgo the few shows that I watched. With the support of The Happy Rockette, I called Comcast. I held firm and canceled cable while saving a $100 across our phone, cable, and internet bills. We still have basic channels for reception sake, but hopefully the TV will be off mostdays. I will report back on how things have changes in a few weeks.

If you want to know what finally caused us to cut the cable, it wasn’t just one thing. It was the sum total of multiple inputs that lead to the courage to finish the job. Here is what I think contributed:

Discussing the issue and attempting to quit in July. Without that, I don’t know if would have been able to follow through. It is so easy to find a reason to keep the cable on. I mean, we have to watch that next episode of Heroes.
Having full support and encouragement of your spouse really goes a long way.
The responsibility for protecting and raising our son. Even at 27 months, he still doesn’t watch TV for more than 5 minutes at a time, but we did. Now the TV won’t be on, and I will teach and play with my son more.
A healthy respect for the amount of money spent over the years and in the future. Thousands!!!!
Filling my life with more important tasks. I found that I often would watch TV for an hour or so which caused me to go to bed without something I wanted accomplish undone. Ultimately, I want accomplish the other tasks more than I wanted to watch TV. The addiction often clouds that judgment though.
The Hollywood writer’s strike. It really did provide perspective on how much our culture is wrapped up in TV.
I knew that once I broke the addiction, I won’t miss it.

If anyone else is considering the same thing, feel free to post a comment and get some support.

» Filed Under About Me, Chasing Dreams, Productivity

The Cost Of Having Children

Posted on November 28, 2007

A year after our son joined our family, I remember looking back over our budget and being amazed. Nothing had changed!!!

How could that be? We had host of new expenses like a $100 every few months formula, yet the amount we could put towards debt and save each month hadn’t really changed.

What happened was that having a child changed our priorities. Things like going to dinner and a movie disappeared and the money was routed to more important places. No longer was getting new coat important. I would rather stay home with my family instead of going to a Phillies game. Because this unconscious change in priorities, we had same amount of money was going out each month, but where the money went was affected by our new priorities.

The best part is that I would pay all our extra money each month just to retain the endearing smile that crosses my face every time I think of my son. So far, being a parent has been easier and more wonderful than I thought. I wasn’t able to account for the depth of love and devotion that forms between a parent and a child. I would be willing to sacrifice a bunch of money each month, but it turns out that I don’t have too!

» Filed Under About Me, Children and Money

No Thanks In Thanksgiving But I Am Grateful

Posted on November 25, 2007

The unthankful heart… discovers no mercies;
but let the thankful heart sweep through the day and,
as the magnet finds the iron, so it will find, in every hour, some heavenly blessings!
-Henry Ward Beecher

As I drove home from the second of our family’s Thanksgiving meals, I was struck by the fact that I hadn’t given thanks for much of anything. WOW, on a day that the US is supposed to collectively express gratitude for everything in our lives, I hadn’t let the spirit of the Thanksgiving change me. I was so wrapped up in the business of the day that even the prayers of Thanksgiving before meals went in one ear and out of the other.

I would love to blame the whole thing on allowing myself to be too busy, but if I am honest with myself, I am not a grateful person. Not ungrateful to the point that I abuse the blessings I have been given, but ungrateful in a “I just don’t think about it” way. I can try to justify it with soft words, but ungrateful is ungrateful.

The frustrating part is that I have so so much to be thankful for: awesome wife, child, job, wealth, energy, passion, and freedom just to name a few.

It’s time to change the orientation of my heart. I don’t want to be that person anymore. It doesn’t align with who I want to be and where my life is going. My financial dream is to give money away, and that doesn’t happen unless I change my heart. Next Thanksgiving look different, but I am not going to wait that long to change my. Now is the time.

While researching the benefits of gratitude I came across a list of four things that anyone can start right now to start producing a grateful heart :

“Maintain a gratitude journal. Emmons’ research showed that people who keep gratitude journals on a weekly basis exercise more regularly, report fewer physical symptoms, feel better about their lives as a whole, and maintain greater optimism about the future.
Create a list of benefits in your life and ask yourself, “To what extent do I take these for granted?” Some people need such concrete visual reminders to maintain mindfulness of their gratitude, explains Emmons.
Talk to yourself in a creative, optimistic, and appreciate manner, suggests Sam Quick, PhD, of the University of Kentucky. This could entail simply reflecting on things for which you’re grateful or, if you’re facing a challenging situation, seeing how it can ultimately be beneficial. For instance, having to cope with particularly difficult people in your job or neighborhood can improve your patience and understanding.
Reframe a situation by looking at it with a different, more positive attitude, offers Quick. He provides this example: Rather than seeing his 6-year-old daughter as cranky, irritable, and troublesome, a father might reach the conclusion that the youngster is tired and needs rest.”*

I am going to start the process by doing a gratitude journal entry on Sunday mornings. I will start by speaking out loud and writing down the items that I am thankful for. I will start with this small concrete measurable task and see where the growth of gratitude takes me. I know it will change my life and my perspective, and I welcome the change! The first entry in the journal will be about how I am grateful for not being grateful on Thanksgiving and the spirit that awoke me to the notion! It’s going to change my life.

*Source : Boost Your Health With a Dose of Gratitude (WebMD)

» Filed Under About Me, Happiness, Materialism

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