Frugal Family Traditions
Posted by Debt Destroyer on October 12, 2009
This past weekend my family said “Goodbye to Summer” and “Hello to Fall” (Not just because we turned on the heat for the first time either).
In what is becoming a yearly family tradition we took a hiking trip in a state park which allowed us to enjoy some beautiful fall foilage. I understand that in some parts of the country it is no big deal to look at trees, but here in the northern plains it is. Such a big deal in fact, that we are willing to drive 90 min (one way) to get there.
As a kid, my family also did this. We would join up with my uncle’s family and have a fun-filled day hiking through the woods, finding snakes, collecting leaves, and trying to cross the stream without falling in (My cousin would fall in every year).
The best part of the trip was that we’d get to go to Ike’s Chicken Shack afterwoods. It was a buffet, but it also had a zoo, an arcade, and a old-time movie theater(3 Stooges, Laurel & Hardy).
Add all of this up and it made for a super fun day full of wonderful memories!
So of course I’d like to treat my family to the same kind of fun. Sadly Ike’s closed down a while ago, but the hiking trail is alive and well. So for the last couple of years we’ve been packing up and hitting the road on the first weekend of October.
This year we added a picnic to the mix and the kids were SUPER EXCITED! Who would’ve thought a thermos full of tomato soup and some stale crackers could garner such feelings?
I’m glad they were extra excited. Because the weather wasn’t ideal. It was cool and there were off an on light rain showers all day. But we didn’t let that stop us. In fact the foul weather kept the crowds away (yes, we get crowds in South Dakota) so we practically had the place to ourselves.
It was great!
It was a little early to catch the full beauty of leaves changing color, but that didn’t stop our good time. My wife took some super fun photos (something that you can never have enough of) of the kids & I pretending to explore a hidden jungle while on the lookout for dangerous creatures.
It didn’t even bother us when our picnic got rained on. In fact we took a vote and declared that we’re going to do this every year. Of course that means every year until the kids get too cool to hang out with their parents.
But that’s not all…
Our “fall family weekend” wasn’t over yet though. The next day we went to a pumpkin patch that our town puts on. We heard about it before, but never went. Boy were we missing out!
It’s not a real pumpkin patch, but still really fun. Let me explain:
1000 pumpkins are shipped to the fairgrounds. Then different local groups team up and set up games and events for the kids to do (story time, face painting, train rides). Of course, the main attraction is that they get to pick out a pumpkin and decorate it.
Did I mention, that it’s FREE!
We had so much fun that we decided that we’d try to combine these two fun fall activities every year. The best part is other than a $6 park fee and a half-tank of gas, this was a pretty cheap weekend.
Which makes sense, most traditions usually are affordable. It’s all the other stuff that costs money.
And what do we remember? The traditions!
Last holiday season I mentioned some of my family’s Chistmas traditions or at least the ones we’d like to have. Well, we’re always looking for some more, so imagine my gratitude when a couple of weeks ago REAL SIMPLE had an article with some fun suggestions for new family traditions. Here are the ones that my wife and I thought that we’d try out to see if they stick:
- Happy Half-Birthday Celebrate a half-birthday with hamburgers and hot dogs sliced in half, half-filled glasses of soda, and a half-chocolate/half-vanilla cake. In the middle of the party, belt out “Happy Birthday,” but stop singing halfway through the song.
- First Snow Festival
The first snowfall of the year merits a warm bowl of “melting snowman soup” (potato soup with mini carrot noses and olives or peas for eyes). - Thanksgiving Turkey Parade
After hours of waiting (hungrily), announce your bird’s grand entrance with a parade. March the turkey through the house, with your eager young guests trailing behind. Musical pots and pans optional but encouraged. - Santa’s Toy Swap
Along with cookies and milk, leave old toys under the tree on Christmas Eve for Santa to take back to the North Pole, where his elves can repair them for other children.
While all of these sound fun, the one we’re really excited to try is the Santa Toy Swap. As mention earlier, my kids have too many toys, this sounds like a great way to “thin the herd.”
How about you? What are some of your fun family traditions? Any off the wall ones?
Until next time,
-DD
» Filed Under About Me, Children and Money, Money Savers
Are You Ready for Some Financial Football?
Posted by Debt Destroyer on September 20, 2009
Woo-Hoo! Football has finally started!
Better yet I got to watch my favorite team, The Washington Redskins, on TV(This is a big deal when you live in the middle of nowhere and you only have three channels). But let ye football gods strike me down because I ended up watching more of the US Open than I did the pigskin.
The way I figured I only had one more day of tennis left on TV, but I have 20 more weeks of football.
Besides every time I turned to the football game, the Giants were kicking butt, so I decided it was best that I didn’t watch. But I made sure to check my fantasy players.
That’s right, I’m a nerd!
The Redskins may have started out poorly, but my two fantasy teams are off to a great start(probably because I don’t have any Redskins…j/k I have Cooley).
And while I’m already a huge fantasy football fan, today I stumbled upon another football game that I think I’ll like.
It’s geared for teachers to use it in their classroom to help teach students financial literacy.
The game (sponsored by VISA) has four quick lesson plans which they recommend you go through before playing. They call it “training camp.”
- The Fundamentals of Net Worth
- Savings and Interest
- Credit & Debit Cards
- The Art of Budgeting
I didn’t have the patience to go through “training camp” so I dived in right away.
Here is an example of the questions they ask:
What is the first step in settling a retail dispute?
If you answered “call the retailer with whom you have the dispute”, you wouldn’t get tackled and gain a first down. The crowd would cheer and you’d get another question.
I opted to only play one quarter due to lack of time, and before I knew it I had The Redskins getting revenge on the Giants for their week one let down. I marched down the field and scored at will.
But getting back to the point…
I thought it was an interesting way to reach out to kids and get them thinking about their finances. You should play it for yourself and let me know what you think.
Do you think it is appropriate material for classroom use? Do you think kids will take to it? Does it leave a bad taste in your mouth knowing it’s sponsored by Visa? Or do you think its crazy that the Redskins can march down the field on anyone?
Until next time,
-DD
» Filed Under Children and Money, Credit Cards
Daycare Dilemma – One Year Later
Posted by Debt Destroyer on July 27, 2009
You’ll get 5 bonus points if you remember that one of the first posts that I wrote for The Happy Rock was about daycare. Back then daycare was costing us about $950 a month. So its no wonder why I wrote about it, it was our biggest monthly expense.
Long time readers will also note that I soon lost my job, went back to school and cut the kids down to 20 hours a week at daycare. That change brought our bill down to the $650/month range.
The months went by. The kids learned their ABC’s, they had the cutest Christmas program ever, and they got to go on a bunch of fun field trips. We loved the center, it was only 4 blocks form our house, the staff was fantastic, they were super cool with my daughters food allergies, and they didn’t give us grief for our goofy schedule. Everything was going great.
Notice I said “was”.
In March we received word that after 27 years of operation, our daycare center would be closing June 30th(I guess it was losing money hand over fist). This threw our life, and a bunch of lives in a tizzy.
We put our names on the list for the only other center in town we’ve heard good things about, but so did the other 66 parents. Only a few got in. We weren’t one of them. We visited another center in town and were left rather unimpressed. But we asked to be on their waiting list anyway.
Let me tell you, it was no fun going through the motions of looking for daycares again. Especially when the town we live in already had a childcare shortage.
Uggh!
But as luck would have it we heard through the grapevine that a new Montessori school was opening. We made a phone call and had an interview. The kids loved it, and the “teacher” loved our kids. And the best part is that the cost is going to be $450 a month(It’s only a half day program). All we needed to do was fill out the app and pay a deposit and we’d be on our way to an appealing childcare solution that saved us $200 a month*.
But there was a catch. There’s always a catch.
The Montessori school isn’t going to be operational until the end of August. So that left us with a two month gap with no childcare. What would we do…Daddy Daycare?
Yeah right!
On May’s expense report, you’ll notice $173.84 for Park & Rec Classes. This cost represents a three hour afternoon program Mon-Thurs, that my daughter goes to during June & July. During that same time, my son is usually napping. So with the afternoons taken care of, all we needed was a solution for the mornings.
It pays to have friends!
I’m taking summer school classes in the morning, and this my wife’s busy time of the year (wedding photography) so we were in a pickle as to what to do. But then a couple of our friends volunteered their kids to come over to our house and play with our kids during that time. My wife works from home so she’ll be in her office, if they need anything.
We offered to pay the kids $10/day but their parents said that was too much. We’ll settle on something soon enough, but whatever it is, it will be far cheaper than normal daycare.
In August both my and my daughter’s classes will be over, so we’ll probably cut the kids loose and let them enjoy the remainder of their summer vacation. Then me and the kids will have to find ways of entertaining ourselves.
I’m guessing there will be a lot of bike rides to the park in my future.
So as you can see a lot can change in a year.
If you have one, how has your daycare/childcare situation been going? Are you pleased with your current setup, or are you looking to make a change.
Until next time,
-DD
*In reality we won’t be seeing $200 in savings. Daycare provided lunches for our kids, the Montessori school won’t. But my kids hardly eat, so I don’t think that will add up to much.
» Filed Under Children and Money
16 Year Old Skips The Last Two Years Of High School To Play Profesional Baseball
Posted by The Happy Rock on June 18, 2009
16 year old Bryce Harper has chosen to forgo the last two years of high school in order to get his GED and enter the Major League Baseball draft. Harper, sometimes called baseball’s Lebron James, is bigger, stronger, and better than most 20 somethings. The phenom is looking to cash in big with a guaranteed signing bonus when the draft rolls around next June. He is under the guidance of the notorious super-agent Scott Boras who routinely brokers the biggest and craziest contracts in Major League Baseball. Major League Baseball most likely won’t interfere even though he is so young, since they often draft in foreign players at that age.
Parents Gone Wild. Money Fever. Call it what you want, but this just seems crazy.
So much for being a kid, because I can’t help but think of what it took to get to be that good at 16. He is obviously supremely blessed athletically, but one can only assume that his parents groomed him from an early age. Long time scout, Gary Hughes chimes in about how parents are pushing their children at an early ages.
Traveling squads for little kids, parents paying up to a thousand bucks for a weekend. I have a 10-year-old grandson who is a closer. A closer. I know one family where the parents are assessed 45 bucks per kid – they have two kids – for a session with a strength and conditioning coach. They’re 9 years old.
How knows why parents do this sort of thing, we can only guess: vanity, living their dreams through their children, for the money, or maybe for fame. Anyway you slice it, it doesn’t quite seem fair to the children.
I grew up playing baseball at an early age and loved it. I played on multiple teams each year and it took up the majority of my time, but it was because I wanted to. I could have been better if I lifted weights or did more formal training and my parents tried to give me those options if they could, but in reality it was too much. You need time to hang out, play capture the flag, school dances….kid stuff.
I know it takes that sort of dedication now a days, but at what cost? Is this just too much or am I missing the bigger picture? Should he make sure to grab the money before people find out he isn’t that good or before he gets injured? I mean imagine all the records you can break if you are in the major leagues by age 18!
Source : MLB Yahoo
» Filed Under Children and Money
The Choice For Expensive Daycare – This Why I Do This Stuff
Posted by The Happy Rock on June 4, 2009
I just got back from picking up my two boys, age 16 months and 3 1/2 years, from pre-school. It was their first day. After years of in-home single sitter care both boys were ready for something else. The youngest is a social little guy with a shorter attention span. He thrives on social interaction and is quite bored(aka naughty) in our 1000sqft condo. The oldest, The Pebble, is the smart shy engineer type. He would be happy to stay home by himself dissecting his toys and building trains. He would benefit from the social and relationship growth as well as more structured learning time.
The choice to put the boys into daycare was not an easy one, as daycare in general just doesn’t mesh well with our parenting and family philosophy. With that being said it would make some sense that we didn’t opt for daycare, instead we chose an expensive pre-school. You may not think there is a difference, but to us there is. We visited one or two places until we stumbled upon Creme de la Creme. It is the kind of place that once you visit, you want to send your children there. All the other places pale in comparison and look so tainted.
It is structured more like school with a homeroom teacher that travels with the children as the move from classroom to classroom. Plenty of friendly staff, impeccably clean, great diversity in ethnicity, and a broad range of educational opportunities. The only downside…….uber expensive. A 5 day a week program was about $1200-1300 a month. We are looking at $300 a week for two boys for just 3 half days. It still sounds ridiculous to me, but there are other things to consider than just money.
Pluses
- We can afford it. By having 1 and half good salaries and haven’t spent five years digging out of $70,000 in debt and building a solid emergency fund, you get to consider these types of decisions. This is what financial freedom is about to some extent. It isn’t something we would have dreamed about 3 years ago, but now our personal finances are in a much different state. I mean this is why we do all this money stuff, right?
- It is an amazing school. Parents rave about it. Children seem to love it. The teachers really seem to have a keen interest and desire to improve your children’s lives. We think the boys will love it and don’t feel any regret dropping them off in the morning.
- It is an easily reversible decision. If we don’t like it or realize that it is causing financial strain, then 30 days noticed is all that is needed.
- Change your family tree. Every parent wants their children to have a better life than themselves. The word ‘better’ is very subjective word so money and stuff becomes an easy measurement, although it is not always the best.
Minuses
- Not keeping it real. It may seem a little strange, but I don’t want to be those parents. The parents that spoils their children. The parents that can use money to insulate their children from real life. We aren’t those parents, so I want to continue to make sure that the boys have a diverse life education. I grew up on welfare and government cheese in my early life and watched my mom struggle to move from poverty to a $60,000+ a year job. I lived a broad range of life experiences along the way and I am so grateful for them all.
- Using money and good things to replace real parenting. This is the flip side of the last pluses point. A good education is great, but I want to make sure that it isn’t a replacement for life education and experiences. I also know that things like moral and character development are potentially more impact on my son’s lives. A good education shouldn’t replace the everyday opportunities to grow my child’s personalities and develop their character.
- Makes ‘real’ school dull. The thought seriously has gone through my mind that this experience could ruin their perspective on what school will be like.
The reason I am sharing is because it wasn’t an easy clear cut decision for me. Of course they could do quite well with less expensive care, but my children are one of my top three priorities in life and my finances among other things should reflect that. This is one gift for the boys I was willing to test out.
What are your thoughts? Do you disagree with some of my reasoning or am I spot on? What would you do?
» Filed Under Children and Money, Spending
Grandma, Please Stop Spoiling Our Children
Posted by Debt Destroyer on March 19, 2009
Grandparents are great aren’t they?
I don’t know about you, but I have very fond memories of my grandparents. There’s the trips to the zoo, baseball games, & museums. I remember having lots of sleepovers with great food and a never ending supply of cookies. But above all I remember lots and lots of treats and toys.
I see that same pattern repeating itself for my children and their grandparents. And that is wonderful, but…
Our house is full of the crap that the grandparents give their “precious little angles”.
For example, at the end of January my son turned two. The previous Christmas, Santa Claus brought him 4 toy dinosaurs. He loved them! The grandparents must have caught wind of this so for his birthday he must have got every dinosaur the store had.
“What’s the problem DD, that isn’t so bad?”
You’re right, there is nothing wrong with that. But that wasn’t the only gifts he got from them. He also got a train set, remote control cars, a sit & spin, some action figures, and a bunch of other stuff.
Putting aside the problem that most of his presents were not age appropriate (his older sister has decided that they are her toys), our main issue with our parent’s generosity is that it’s starting to feel like our dinning room has turned into a toy storage room.
I remember a couple of years ago my mother-in-law joking with me, telling me that she could help me fill up my basement and garage. I’m starting to think she wasn’t joking (See the cackle throws you off. You think its a laugh, but in reality the cackle is mother-in-law for “sucka”).
Before I totally bemoan the act of grandparents spoiling their grandchildren rotten, let me say that I love the bags of clothes we get from their rummage sales exploits, and the occasional free babysitting. I’m just wondering if any Happy Rock readers out there has dealt with this before?
Is there a tactful way of looking a gifthorse in the mouth and ask it to lighten up ?
Dropping hints doesn’t seem to work. Neither does saying, “Please don’t buy that.”
We’ve resigned to just smile and bear it.
We’ve tried holding a rummage sale before, but our parents ended up coming to it. It was quite obvious that they didn’t like seeing all the stuff they’ve given to us over the years for sale. Of course in true parent form, they don’t say anything, they just laid on the guilt later on.
So what happens is that we try not to open the things that we don’t think the kids will play with, then we regift. That’s right I admit to regifting. It is a wonderful way to get rid of unused or unwanted gifts! Heck, I think we still have a few wedding presents that we looking to unload.
Just last night we discovered that our daughter has 5 sets of “Go Fish” card games, all given to her by grandparents. Luckily two of them haven’t been opened yet. So look out parents of little girls…if you invite us to a B-Day celebration you know what you’ll be getting.
Do you have any 5′s…Go Fish
Until next time,
-DD
» Filed Under About Me, Children and Money, Serving Others
Libraries Rock! Free Books, Movies, and Entertainement For All
Posted by Debt Destroyer on March 18, 2009
Have you been to a library lately?
For those of you who were scared off by the Dewey Decimal System, it’s time for a visit. You might not recognize the place.
The card catalog is long gone, it’s been replaced with banks of computers. The scary looking reference section has been transformed into the video section. The hard wooden tables and chairs have been replaced with soft comfy furniture.
It’s a whole new world.
I have to admit I missed the transformation. It wasn’t until I had kids that I decided to see what the library had to offer me. And boy am I ever glad I did.
It started one Saturday when my wife was shooting a wedding. She had the van, and I was cooped up with two little kids. It was a nice enough day out so we decided to pile into the stroller and go for a walk. Luckily for us our local library is only 2 blocks away (living “downtown” has some advantages).
We headed straight downstairs to the children’s section and I don’t think we’ve ever left.
My kids went right to the puzzles and toys, but I headed right to the movie section. Movies are big in our house (no cable) and I think we were all starting to go insane from watching the same ones over, and over, and over…Now I’d be able to check out 5 videos for 2 weeks. Hallelujah!
We also get 10 books. Which now made reading stories before bed a little less monotonous as well.
Going to the library quickly became our favorite part of Saturday (after cartoons of course). But then it got even better when we found out about…
Story Time!
Every Tuesday night the library hosts story time. This is where they read a couple of stories, then make something in craft time, and watch a short video. Each week has it’s own theme. So now we routinely go to the library twice a week. I don’t know how’d we function without it.
But the library is not all about kids.
At ours they have various book clubs and writing groups that meet monthly. I’ve always been tempted to join these but my plate is pretty full now (going back to school and all), but someday…
A couple of summers ago when my tennis game needed a boost, I made a trip to the library and before I knew it I was reading about doubles strategies and having Arthur Ashe and Stan Smith give me private lessons in my living room.
I’ve gone on long enough now professing my love for libraries. How about you share some of your favorite things about them.
Until next time,
-DD
» Filed Under Children and Money, Giving, Money Savers
The Happy Rock And The Carnival Ride – Financial Childhood Lessons
Posted by The Happy Rock on March 16, 2009
Below is a post describing a fun frugal experience from my childhood written by The Happy Boulderette(The Happy Rock’s Mom). The story itself is neat, but what makes it even more interesting is the striking similarity it has to a post that I wrote about Teaching The Happy Pebble about the value of a dollar. It is great to see that lessons learned as a child are still bearing fruit almost 30 years later. You can change your family tree.
The Happy Boulderette has 2$ in her pocket and the local carnival is set up in the supermarket parking lot around the corner. She shares this info with The Happy Rock(age 6) – he is super excited and they attend the carnival that evening.
Quality time was spent between mom and son as they walked around and laughed and talked about how to spend their 2$. The process was long and they eventually decided to ride one particular amusement ride prior to heading home. Woohoo!!! It sure was fun!!!
Much later in life, the Happy Boulderette is pondering years back and realizes that many valuable lessons were taught that evening. Many of them were definitely financially related. At the time, she hadn’t even known she was having an impact on her son’s life.
Our children’s watchful eyes are upon us and financial lessons are being learned even when they are not intentional.
» Filed Under Children and Money, Financial Succes
Teaching Toddlers About Money – The Pebble And The Dollar
Posted by The Happy Rock on February 5, 2009
The Happy Pebble(age 3) couldn’t contain his excitement as we pumped up a 3 foot long ‘rocket’ balloon and watched it sputter around the room. For him it was the joyous culmination of a life money lesson that he didn’t even know he participated in.
The story begins with the Pebble and I making a few homemade thank you cards for gifts received at Christmas. It took us a few weeks after the holidays, but gratitude is better late then never. We mailed the cards off and in not too long he received a surprise letter in the mail from his Great Gram. It had a return thank you note saying she loved the card that it was hanging on the fridge. She even reinforced her gratitude by including a single dollar as a surprise!
The Pebble was elated, since he is usually happy to nab the spare change from around the house and throw it in his piggy bank. His very first dollar. His joy grew after I mentioned that we should go to the store and buy a toy.
The next day The Pebble, Pebble Junior, and myself spent a good hour in Target. I had to stay patient because this is where the real magic happened and where he began to understand the power of a dollar. He would point to toys and I would kindly explain that it would be 10 of the dollars he has. He happily kept looking and asking, but wasn’t willing to accept the toys that he could afford. He also wasn’t willing to ‘save’ the dollar and wait so that he could get something bigger, even offering to kick in some money for the effort.
Eventually after looking through all 10 aisles more than once he realized that he couldn’t afford something big and happily settled on Rocket Balloons. It included a mini air pump and long balloons that you pump up and let go to see them rocket around the room. Even though it was twice what he had(I didn’t tell him), it was still under $2 and he had learned a lesson in the value of a dollar and had great fun doing it. He shyly gave the money to the cashier and beamed with excitement until we could open the package and start playing. Lesson over.
Any readers have great stories to share on how they are teaching their toddlers about money?
» Filed Under Children and Money, Psychology of Spending
Reader Stories : The Beauty of Frugality and Family
Posted by The Happy Rock on January 26, 2009
A Happy Rock reader shared this story with me and I loved the images so much and thought the readers would too.
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The scene was a ‘girls night out’ were the girls of the family went out to run errands and grab a bite to eat. This exchange took place :
Mom asked her daughter(11 years old) how she and her friends were getting along. The daughter said that everything was fine, but sometimes she wished she had a cell phone as a lot of her friends got one or an updated one for Christmas. Nobody in the family has an expensive cell phone right now, and Mom continued on and asked if it bothered her a lot that she doesn’t have one. Then came this beautiful reply.
She responded with “sometimes, but not really. I don’t see why they pay to “text” their friends when it’s pretty much the same as e-mailing. I can e-mail for free. So why pay for it? And why do they need one right now. You are always there when I need you, so I don’t have to call and find out where you are or when you are picking me up, we always have that worked out. I think they are just wasting money.”
Mom didn’t quite know what to say and just smiled as they ate their Arby’s 4 for $5 dinner.
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So much great stuff in there :
- Mom was intentional about the time she spent with her children. It would have been easier to run errands with out the children around, but they need that type of interaction and learning. Opportunities to parent happen much more frequently when you intentionally create opportunities were the relationship can move deeper.
- They didn’t need to do something fancy, the relationship was the most important part of the equation.
- Mom took an interest in her daughter’s life and was willing to go past the surface. She could have just stopped at the cell phone complaint, but she didn’t. Even if the daughter gave a different answer it would have been a great time to help guide her.
- Mom had already set a good financial example. The daughter knew were the family stood on money issues and what was really important to them.
- Mom lived her values. The daughter trusted that Mom would always be there and that only comes from years trust creating experiences.
- The daughter isn’t defined by what she has or by what her friends do, but she defines herself at least partially by her family and can be her own person.
Money and frugality is there to free ourselves for these types of moments in life. Money can’t create this type of beauty!
» Filed Under Children and Money, Materialism, Serving Others
The Happy Rock is a dual writer personal finance and personal development community dedicated to creating positive change that propels us towards success.
