The Cost Of Having Children

Posted by The Happy Rock on November 28, 2007

A year after our son joined our family, I remember looking back over our budget and being amazed. Nothing had changed!!!

How could that be? We had host of new expenses like a $100 every few months formula, yet the amount we could put towards debt and save each month hadn’t really changed.

What happened was that having a child changed our priorities. Things like going to dinner and a movie disappeared and the money was routed to more important places. No longer was getting new coat important. I would rather stay home with my family instead of going to a Phillies game. Because this unconscious change in priorities, we had same amount of money was going out each month, but where the money went was affected by our new priorities.

The best part is that I would pay all our extra money each month just to retain the endearing smile that crosses my face every time I think of my son. So far, being a parent has been easier and more wonderful than I thought. I wasn’t able to account for the depth of love and devotion that forms between a parent and a child. I would be willing to sacrifice a bunch of money each month, but it turns out that I don’t have too!

» Filed Under About Me, Children and Money

Listen To The Dave Ramsey Show For Free

Posted by The Happy Rock on November 25, 2007

Everyone who is struggling to get out of debt knows how hard it is. If you are looking for some support, advice, and motivation, Dave Ramsey is your man. During the 3 years it took us to get out of debt, I know listening to Dave Ramsey show kept my juices flowing. I don’t think I can give a better endorsement than the fact that listening to Dave’s show got me out of debt much faster(years) than I would have on my own. Listening to other people go through the same thing helped remove the embarrassment and fear and gave me some great new ideas. You can click here for a link to MP3 archives of his daily 3 hour radio show. The format of the site has changed a little bit, but you can click on the ‘Archives’ tab to get access to the MP3 files for his latest shows.

Some people don’t like Dave’s personality, but a lot more people are grateful for his help in getting them out of debt. For anyone who doesn’t know who Dave Ramsey is check out Total Money Makover.

» Filed Under Debt Elimination

No Thanks In Thanksgiving But I Am Grateful

Posted by The Happy Rock on November 25, 2007

The unthankful heart… discovers no mercies;
but let the thankful heart sweep through the day and,
as the magnet finds the iron, so it will find, in every hour, some heavenly blessings!
-Henry Ward Beecher

As I drove home from the second of our family’s Thanksgiving meals, I was struck by the fact that I hadn’t given thanks for much of anything. WOW, on a day that the US is supposed to collectively express gratitude for everything in our lives, I hadn’t let the spirit of the Thanksgiving change me. I was so wrapped up in the business of the day that even the prayers of Thanksgiving before meals went in one ear and out of the other.

I would love to blame the whole thing on allowing myself to be too busy, but if I am honest with myself, I am not a grateful person. Not ungrateful to the point that I abuse the blessings I have been given, but ungrateful in a “I just don’t think about it” way. I can try to justify it with soft words, but ungrateful is ungrateful.

The frustrating part is that I have so so much to be thankful for: awesome wife, child, job, wealth, energy, passion, and freedom just to name a few.

It’s time to change the orientation of my heart. I don’t want to be that person anymore. It doesn’t align with who I want to be and where my life is going. My financial dream is to give money away, and that doesn’t happen unless I change my heart. Next Thanksgiving look different, but I am not going to wait that long to change my. Now is the time.

While researching the benefits of gratitude I came across a list of four things that anyone can start right now to start producing a grateful heart :

“Maintain a gratitude journal. Emmons’ research showed that people who keep gratitude journals on a weekly basis exercise more regularly, report fewer physical symptoms, feel better about their lives as a whole, and maintain greater optimism about the future.
Create a list of benefits in your life and ask yourself, “To what extent do I take these for granted?” Some people need such concrete visual reminders to maintain mindfulness of their gratitude, explains Emmons.
Talk to yourself in a creative, optimistic, and appreciate manner, suggests Sam Quick, PhD, of the University of Kentucky. This could entail simply reflecting on things for which you’re grateful or, if you’re facing a challenging situation, seeing how it can ultimately be beneficial. For instance, having to cope with particularly difficult people in your job or neighborhood can improve your patience and understanding.
Reframe a situation by looking at it with a different, more positive attitude, offers Quick. He provides this example: Rather than seeing his 6-year-old daughter as cranky, irritable, and troublesome, a father might reach the conclusion that the youngster is tired and needs rest.”*

I am going to start the process by doing a gratitude journal entry on Sunday mornings. I will start by speaking out loud and writing down the items that I am thankful for. I will start with this small concrete measurable task and see where the growth of gratitude takes me. I know it will change my life and my perspective, and I welcome the change! The first entry in the journal will be about how I am grateful for not being grateful on Thanksgiving and the spirit that awoke me to the notion! It’s going to change my life.

*Source : Boost Your Health With a Dose of Gratitude (WebMD)

» Filed Under About Me, Happiness, Materialism

Play A Game And Help End Global Hunger

Posted by The Happy Rock on November 20, 2007

“About 25,000 people die each day from hunger or hunger-related causes, most of them children.”

“The United Nations estimates that the cost to end world hunger completely, along with diseases related to hunger and poverty, is about $195 billion a year.”

This is post is about shedding some light on poverty around the world. It is so easy to get wrapped up in our small world and own finances without giving as much as a thought to those who have much less around the world.

The quotes above were provided by an innovative new new site called FreeRice.com(click the banner to check out the site). The site promises to donate grains of rice to the United Nations World Food Program (WFP) for each question correctly answered in a vocabulary game. The non-profit business model will use the money from advertising to buy the grains of rice that are earned by the players. Players get 10 grains of rice for each question that is answered correctly. Yesterday, 170,885,620 grains of rice were earned by the community of players.

I am not sure that the business model is sustainable in its current form or if the statistics are very accurate, but I love the sentiment. Create a site that has intrinsic value for the users by providing fun and learning, increase the conversation about global poverty, and attempt to do something to help. The site is a brainchild of poverty.com‘s private owner John Breen. Kudos!

One other intersting note is that “twenty-two developed countries below have pledged to work towards each giving 0.7% (a little less than 1%) of their national income in international aid, which would raise the $195 billion.” The US is one of them. Click here to see a full list and the progress that has been made.

I achieve level 35-40 in the vocab game, if any one is interested. It takes a fair amount of guessing correctly to get that my score that high though.

» Filed Under Food, Giving, Serving Others

How To Get Out Of Debt Faster – Big Shovel Edition

Posted by The Happy Rock on November 18, 2007

One of the best tips for digging out from under a mountain of debt is to get a bigger shovel. Outside of finding deep meaningful motivation for getting out of debt, increasing the amount of money you put towards debt each month will probably the next biggest catalyst for overcoming debt. Note that if you haven’t truly figured out your financial purpose, you may not have the motivation to finish the job. But if getting out of debt is truly important, why only use your current income to get you there? Here is a list of some ways to create more money to help bust your way out of debt.

Cut Costs – You should be tracking your weekly and monthly expenses, and testing them against your desire to get out of debt. Things like cable, eating out, and movies are all taking away from the amount of money that you can snowball towards your debt.

Ebay, Craigslist, and Garage Sales – Often our debt gets us a bunch of stuff that we don’t need. Look around your house and consider selling everything that isn’t a necessity. Use the extra cash to put towards your debt. This step also has the added benefit of helping break the pattern of materialism that runs counter to getting and staying out of debt.

Extra Job – Yes, I know you don’t have time or you don’t want too! But deliver some pizzas or packages, shovel some snow, or cut some lawns. Remember that this is a short term solution, to a huge problem. If you change you spending behavior in the process, you shouldn’t ever have to get a second job again. You will reap the benefits of putting forth the extra energy early in the process, and then you can quit your second job and be debt free!

Ask for a Raise – Consider asking for a raise, or taking on more responsibility at work. A positive outcome would have compounding benefits for not only ditching the debt, but also for the rest of your life.

Tap into your Savings – By savings I mean liquid accounts, not things like 401k. This one is usually mathematically logical, because the interest rate on our debt is worse than the rate on the savings. Even if it isn’t, I still argue that changing your financial behavior and dumping debt will radically change you perspective and life enough that you will overcome and surpass that lost savings in no time. This one comes with a caveat though. If you aren’t truly committed to staying out of debt and changing your financial behavior, keep the money in the bank. You will probably find yourself in debt again, but now you don’t have the money in the bank.

Now go out and kick those debt reduction plans into high gear!

» Filed Under Debt Elimination, Financial Succes, Materialism, Psychology of Debt

Have Your Car Fixed For Free : Auto Recalls And My 2003 Nissan Murano

Posted by The Happy Rock on November 15, 2007

If you don’t get your car serviced at a dealership it can be very worthwhile to check the recalls that have been issued for your model vehicle. At SaferCar.gov The National Highway and Traffic Safety Administration(NHTSA) provides a simple tool for viewing and researching all auto recalls. Their website provides a host of information on all recalls, documents containing manufacturer communications to dealer, recall statistics, and even a complaint system. Click here for the NHTSA recall website. You should just be able to schedule an appointment with an approved dealer, if your vehicle identification number falls with the recall campaigns range. The dealer should fix the recall problems for free.

I hadn’t really given recalls much thought until I started to have some recurring problems with my autos. We have a strange electrical problem on my 2003 Nissan Murano that has manifested itself in some strange ways. A recurring check engine light problem, hesitation on acceleration after sitting in traffic for a while, poor idling, and the even a complete shutoff while my wife was driving.

The first repair was a cam sensor by an out of town Nissan dealer. They also fixed at least one recall without me having to ask. Within a few months the same problems existed again. I had the other cam sensor replaced at my local garage. After that I did some searching on the net. That is when I came across a recall for the exact problems I was experiencing. Here are the details :

Summary: ON CERTAIN PASSENGER VEHICLES, THE CIRCUIT BOARD FOR THE CRANK POSITION SENSOR OR CAM POSITION SENSOR MAY HAVE AN IMPROPER SOLDER JOINT DUE TO SOLDER DEFORMATION CAUSED BY HEAT STRESS ACCELERATED BY THE EXISTENCE OF FLUX RESIDUE DURING THE SOLDERING PROCESS.

Consequence: THIS COULD CAUSE THE “SERVICE ENGINE SOON” WARNING LIGHT TO COME ON, CREATE A NO START CONDITION, CAUSE REDUCED ENGINE POWER, OR CAUSE THE ENGINE TO STOP RUNNING WITHOUT WARNING DURING VEHICLE OPERATION, WHICH COULD RESULT IN A CRASH.

Remedy: DEALERS WILL REPLACE THE CRANK POSITION SENSORS. CAMSHAFT POSITION SENSOR(S), AND IN SOME CASES, THE VARIABLE TIMING CONTROL SENSOR(S).”

I called Nissan to at 1-800-647-7261 to see what they could do for me. They said that my VIN didn’t fall within the recall! What! After a week or so of phone tag and my continually pressing the issue, I finally got the Northeast Region Customer Service Manager. She treated me nicely only to tell me go pound sand. Ok, then who do I call to complain? She explained that she was the end of the line and told me to report my complaint to the correct governmental body.

They weren’t going to do anything. How great is that? I have the EXACT problem the recall is addressing, but Nissan could care less. One of the problems is quite dangerous; the engine could “stop running without warning during vehicle operation, which could result in a crash.” Nissan puts my family’s lives at risk, and doesn’t care one bit. That sounds like a huge lawsuit waiting to happen.

I dropped the issue for a while, until the car started doing the same things a month or two later. My mechanic said it was one of the newly replaced cam sensors again, and this time he noticed the recall too. He suggested I try a dealer to see if they will fix it. To really fix the Nissan’s flaws, he would need to buy the approved kit from a dealer and replace the full array of sensors, which could cost around $800. Now I am on the warpath again!

I tried another dealer again, with the same run around. I am not quite sure what the next step is, but I am considering a formal government complaint, a written letter to Nissan, and whining on a personal finance website. If anyone in the industry or anyone with similar experiences has any suggestions, I am all ears.

What I do know is this: I have owned multiple Nissan cars, but I won’t buy another one. The old adage is “don’t by a car that is the first year of a new model”. It is certainly holding true for the Murano.

» Filed Under Cars, Money Savers

Can’t Believe Everything You Read: 1953 Yale Goal Study

Posted by The Happy Rock on November 13, 2007

“Scientists surveyed the Yale class of 1953, and found that 3 percent had written down financial goals for their futures at their college graduation. When the group reconvened in 1973, this 3 percent of the class that had started their careers with some kind of plan controlled more combined net worth than the other 97 percent combined.” – Ririan Project : The 7 Habits of Highly Successful Moneymakers

After I read that, I started scribbling down my goals! Just kidding, but that is some inspiring evidence for writing down your financial goals. Such good evidence that I wanted to take a look at the study to get a better picture of what was going on. I went on a search.

What I found was that Zig Ziglar and Tony Robbins quoted the same study in their writing, but I couldn’t find any information on the real 1953 Yale study. It turns out that the story is urban legend, passed from one self help guru to another. Here is an article at Fast Company that does a great job trying to find the real study and wading through the folk lore.

Ok, now that was disappointing. It doesn’t mean the Yale story hasn’t helped many people over the years, but it really takes some credibility away from the story and some of the famous self-help gurus who quoted it. In the age of the internet it is pretty easy to find answers, but it is also easy to get duped. Now go out and right down some financial goals! I will bring some hard evidence on the affects of goal setting in a future post.

As a side note, I also found that the subliminal advertising message scare was based on another urban legend that sited a movie theater that generated increased profits from telling people to “Eat Popcorn, Drink Coke”.

Source: If Your Goal Is Success, Don’t Consult These Gurus
Source: Self-Help Snake Oil and Self-Improvement Urban Legends
Source: Snopes – Subliminal Advertising

» Filed Under Chasing Dreams, Financial Succes

Should I Report Ethical Misconduct At Work(Poll Included)

Posted by The Happy Rock on November 11, 2007

The Simple Dollar tackled this question this week, and it really got me thinking. I must admit that I was surprised at the non-confrontational I can’t be a tattler sentiment in the article and in the comments. Somehow it feels frustrating that this is the accepted culture of business, but I guess that is reality. If I am honest with myself, it isn’t any easy decision for me either.

With as a backdrop I wanted to explore some of the feeling and perspectives that feed into our current ethical reality.

Reporting someone else’s unethical behavior reminds us of all our own failures. No one is perfect; we would rather not face our own rough edges, so we don’t want to bring up someone else’s.
We don’t want others reporting/exposing us.
We fear ruining relationships with our coworkers.
We fear being wrong and being humiliated by making false accusations.
We don’t think the behavior is all that bad.
We don’t think about the personal impact these situations can have. Unethical behaviors in the workplace have unseen consequences. Often our own ethical standards are subconsciously lowered. Resentment by other group members can arise. Coworker productivity can be affected.
We don’t trust our companies to handle the situation with tact. Maybe they will overreact to a small infraction, or maybe they won’t address a major infraction. Or maybe they will force us to take front stage throughout the whole investigation.
We don’t think about the company’s perspective. Try framing the situation such that you are a business owner. Would you want to know when someone is cooking the books, or selling office supplies on eBay, or not working all of their hours?
People assume that management already knows. Although it is often the case that management isn’t as in touch with the day to day operations as we think.

I am not going to go into detail about which of those are good or bad, but the list can provide us with excellent thought points. Personally, I would love to see companies create cultures where unethical behavior is not accepted(that includes within me). They need to recognize that pointing out someone’s unethical behavior is a very hard decision, and create a policy and culture that helps make that decision as easy as possible. This includes handling each case tactfully and appropriately.

Below is a poll that will attempt to capture the overall sentiment towards reporting unethical behavior:

Opinion Polls & Market Research

» Filed Under Accountability, Careers

Sell Your Old Cell Phone For Cash

Posted by The Happy Rock on November 9, 2007

Did you know that you can sell your old cell phone that you don’t use anymore for cash? I didn’t, but as I looked into a comment I came across a couple sites that give you cash for cell phones. I had heard of sites like Cell Swapper where you can sell your phone and plan to avoid termination fees, but I didn’t realize some sites will give you straight cash for phones without plans.

Sites like Simply Sellular, ~~Cash My Phone~~*, and Phone Is Cash buy old cell phones and resell them. The site Second Rotation buys all kind of gadgets, not just cell phones, and they were also featured on CNET. Our current phone, an inexpensive LG VX4650, is bringing about $9 just to give you some perspective.

Unfortunately, I don’t have an unused cell phone to sell and write a review, but I would love to hear any reader’s success stories. Also, here is a site that did a review of all three sites about a year and a half ago.

Of course, you could use craigslist or eBay and you might get a little more, but they will probably lose the ease of use battle. Recycling also helps the environment by saving on landfill space and resources. Enjoy!

*Note – (Update 5/2008)Multiple readers have commented about problems with Cash My Phone. There seems to be a pattern developing, and some verifiable information on the web about less than stellar performance.

» Filed Under Cell Phones, Money Savers

Do We Earn The Right Not To Budget?

Posted by The Happy Rock on November 7, 2007

I have admitted it before, The Rockette have never lived on a formal budget. The closest we come to real budgeting is what I label retroactive budgeting. This is when you come up with reasonable spending amount for the different categories like groceries, clothing, entertainment, etc. Then at the end the month you compare the actual totals to your suggested limits.

When we were in the midst of shedding our 70k in debt, we did this almost every month. As the debt shrunk, so did frequency of our retroactive budgeting. I have been trying to decide whether this is a negative thing.

Three things happened as our debt decreased and was eliminated.

Our behavior and spending patterns changed. With less debt and new spending habits our monthly totals feel within a reliable range.
As the immediacy of the situation abated, so did our intensity. Our intensity got us through the tough times and turned the tide, but then our attention slowly began to leak elsewhere.
I felt like we earned the right to not check. Not checking as closely became the reward!

The thing is, changing the direction of the net worth train and your financial habits is heavy tiring work. Work that pays off down the road and work that removes stress. For those of you that are in the midst of an intense debt struggle, this can be a light at the end of the tunnel. For those of us who weathered the storm and are in cruise control, you know that freedom that is created from not having to worry and stress over your finances.

Sometimes, I think I am sacrificing financial efficiency, because of laziness. Other times I remember that the reason I got out of debt was to have the freedom to focus on other areas of my life without having my finances dictate decisions. Obviously, I think the latter is more often the reality or else I would be much more diligent about checking.

What are the readers opinion on the matter? Are you earning the right to ‘slack’, or are you going to better off if you stay focused and efficient?

» Filed Under Debt Elimination, Energy, Favorites, Motivation, Productivity(Financial)

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